Anchoress Confesses!
Posted by: tony on 12/06/2005 09:53 AM
Updated by: tony on 12/06/2005 10:04 AM
|
Expires: 01/06/2006 12:00 AM
|
The Anchoress did the "confession meme". I have not done it because I'm really not introspective enough to make it interesting to my readers, but The Anchoress is. I took one piece of the whole thing that touched me...
I confess… that I “got” Catholicism better at age 6 than at age 26, and I “get” it better now at 47. Finally. It is a religion for the very young and the finally grown up. Little kids “get” mysticism and wonder. When you grow up, you seek it out. It is only when you are an adolescent, or a young adult that you are convinced that YOU are the wonder, and then you miss it.
I followed her pathway pretty closely in my own life. I remember mystery and the wonder of mass. Knowing when I prayed the "Hail Mary" that a gentle and pretty woman who looked just like the statue in church was listening to me, really listening. When Jesus was exposed in the monstrance, knowing that was really Him there. Seeing pictures of the saints and angels, those who have always known God, and those who are now with Him.
My faith was my rock until Vatican II, and our priest who immediately changed everything around without giving us a clue as to why this was all happening. I was eight years old, and I came to the conclusion that if my religion was this easy to change, it must all be bull****.
This, of course, was not true. It was not easy to change. There were specific, concrete theological and pastoral reasons for doing what was done, but then the American Church took the Vatican II ball, and began creatively interpreting it, not reading what the words said or what the words meant, but what the "Spirit of Vatican II" was telling them. (I confess... Whenever I hear the term "Spirit of Vatican II", the first thing that pops into my mind is Jacob Marley's ghost in Dickens' "A Christmas Carol", all covered in huge, heavy chains.) Had the Devil designed a way to undermine the Catholic Church, he couldn't have done a better job. Satan uses old tools in building his deceptions. This one uses pride. The pride of thinking we know Catholicism better than the Catholic Church. But I digress.
I came back, and I am finding the mystery of God again. Like with the Anchoress, it came naturally to me as a child, but now I have to work at it. I find my ego and my intellect getting in the way. But it's definitely worth the effort.
|
